I just found this. Originally posted March 9, 2004, when the boys were 3 1/2

So here's the "my kids are going to drive me to drink/shoot up/run away" story of the day....
about 2pm.
we head upstairs so i can shower.
(yeah i'm a real go getter, i know)
I turn on sesame street, hoping to entertain them in close proximity to my showering venture.
I tripped and landed with my nose in a book, so i sat down to read for a minute...
They wandered downstairs, and i thought i heard the front door open.
Me in my p.j.s
Them in shirts.
Yup, just shirts.
Max actually had underwear on, but not a stitch on Oliver--in the tradition of such childhood favorites as donald duck, winnie the pooh, etc.
So.
I head to the stairs to check it out.
Front door's wide open.
Me in my p.j.s
I peek out, don't see them.
Walk towards the road, look down the block.
Oh, there they are.
About a block down, picking up broken beer bottle glass.
I was suddenly finding it impossible to imagine that i am not, in fact, white trash.
I was laughing too hard to scold them.
(Is anyone else wondering why they don't behave very well??)
But once we got inside, I did very calmly explain to them that we do NOT go outside without mommy.
Or pants.

Have a great day, and don't neglect your pill/patch/shot/condom supply/vasectomy!!!